Adult Children of Alcoholics Welcome to ACA. Adult Children of Alcoholics is an anonymous Twelve Step program of women and men who grew up in an alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. We meet with each other in a mutually respectful, safe environment and acknowledge our common experiences. We discover how childhood affected us in the past and influences us in the present. We take positive action.
Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents A discussion group on Yahoo. The group is restricted and self moderated. It is "intended to be a nurturing place for learning, validation, and thoughtful discussion."
Estranged From My Parents Dr. Joshua Coleman's forum for adult children estranged from their parents. Coleman is a speaker, psychologist and author of When Parents Hurt and other books.
Parents Who Walk Away A group for parents of estranged adult children who are tired of waiting for them to grow up/get real. Comprised of strong, wise survivors, this group is made up of parents who either have walked away or are considering walking away from the disrespectful actions of their abusive adult children. Straight talk, tough stances and the free exchange of ideas/opinions can be found here. Everyone is Welcome! (Note: This is the new link to PWWA which formerly was hosted on Daily Strength.)
H. E. R. Groups HEALING ESTRANGED RELATIONSHIPS, INC. (H.E.R. Group) was created for women who are experiencing an estranged relationship from an adult child. Our purpose is to provide each woman with a safe environment in which to share what is in her heart; and to be a place where hope, encouragement, support and resources will enable healing in her life.
Estranged Stories A place principally for parents experiencing family estrangement to find support, hopefully peace, and some understanding. Currently has over 5,000 members.
Christian Parents of Estranged Adult Children Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith. (Note: This group is the same one that had been hosted on the Daily Strength site. When DS made its recent changes, this group and others moved off of DS. This link will take you to the current location of the group.)
Support Groups for All
Al anon A Twelve Step group that offers strength and hope for friends and families of problem drinkers. There is likely a meeting near you. Learning the Twelve Steps and following them can make a great deal of difference in your life, no matter whether the issue is with someone who has a drinking problem or some other serious problem that affects them and everyone around them.
BPD Central BPD Central Randi Kreger, author, advocate, and owner of BPDCentral.com, established Welcome to Oz in 1996 to enable family members with a borderline or narcissistic loved one to support each other and share tips and techniques.
Co-Dependents Anonymous Welcome to Co-Dependents Anonymous, a fellowship of men and women whose common purpose is to develop healthy relationships. The only requirement for membership is a desire for healthy and loving relationships. CODA is based on the Twelve Step program. It is much more broad based than Al anon.
Out of the Fog Forum Out of the FOG was launched on November 1 2007 to provide information and support to the family members and loved-ones of individuals who suffer from a personality disorder. FOG stands for Fear, Obligation and Guilt.
1. Man starves himself to death in treehouse By Harry de Quetteville in Berlin. February 26, 2008 Quote from article: "By his body was a chronicle of the 24 days he spent there before he died, in which he wrote of his pain at the break-up of his marriage, his estrangement from his daughter and his long-term unemployment." 2. Charlie Otero: Life After Death, Feb 21, 2008 Quote from article: "This coming Monday, February 25 marks the 3rd anniversary of the arrest of Dennis Rader, the BTK serial killer. But it also marks a new beginning for one of those most affected by BTK's crimes. Charlie Otero will spend the anniversary night watching a documentary about what he and others went through." 3. New Zealand: Woman buried after body-snatching drama, March 7, 2008 Quote from article: "A 76-year-old New Zealand woman was buried on Friday after a drama in which her body was snatched from a hearse by estranged family members who wanted her interred elsewhere, news reports said." 4. The Expositor: Search for blood ties not always happy for one-time residents of maternity home. Posted By Lois Legge 5. Farm Families Challenged to Deal with Emotional Side of Farm Transfers, Fri, 02/29/2008. Charlene M. Shupp Espenshade, Special Sections Editor, Lancaster Farming. 6. Blood Ties, February 29, 2008 Nigel Nicholson is professor of organisational behaviour at LBS. His latest book, Family Wars: Classic conflicts in family business and how to deal with them, written with Grant Gordon, is published this month by Kogan Page. Quote by Nigel Nicholson in Blood Ties: "For our book Family Wars, I and Grant Gordon (director general of the UK's Institute for Family Business) analysed 24 case histories worldwide, looking at some of the highest-profile family conflicts of recent times. We wanted to see what common themes they exhibited, and what lessons might be learned. They are an enthralling mix. There are awesome melodramas of skulduggery, double-cross, relentless vengeance and, in one case (the Gucci saga), even a hitman. Then there are more mundane but equally depressing stories - where families lock themselves into positions of increasing entrenchment." 7. Group helps heal wounds of child estrangement, March 5, 2008 Quote from article: "H.E.R. promises no happily-ever-after outcomes. Ms. Gray has accepted that she may never have a relationship with her daughter. But she said the support group helps her be a better mother to a younger adult daughter."
This is a link to a New York Times article on the pitfalls of online communication through email. (There is some chance you might have to register with the NY Times to read it. But if you do, registration is free and the NY Times has a lot of cool stuff to read!)
My original title for this snippet, "Mummies in the news!", made me squeamish but I went ahead and used it anyway. For those who are connected in real life to this sort of story, it must be anything but funny. It's the sort of story that is funny if it is fiction and on Monty Python. But not so funny if it is you or your mother who ends up mummified on a couch for years and the subject of international news.
I love Scott Adams. There I said it. I love the guy. Today he posted a link to a study about the reactions of some people to angry faces. High-testosterone people reinforced by other's anger new study finds, March 14, 2007 - on the University of Michigan website. Which reminds me instantly of one of my mother's brothers and his love of teasing. And my mother's warped sense of humor where she excuses outrageous behavior in the name of joking. Until now I never would have thought of her as having high testosterone. Otherwise she was a wuss. Scott Adams talks about the implications of this study in this post: This Explains Everything. Now I am going to go and build a thatch hut for Scott Adams.
Ginny (who, until now, never realized that she had escaped the family testosterone curse.)
I didn't see the Paula Zahn segment about Parental Alienation Syndrome on CNN on June 19 but saw a segment from the show on CNN this morning. I found a transcript from the show on the CNN site. To read the section on PAS you need to scroll way down almost to the bottom.
Frank Warren, June 17, at the Reading Public Museum
I had the great pleasure of meeting and photographing Frank Warren of Postsecret when he came to the Reading Public Museum in Reading, PA on Saturday, June 17, for the opening day of an exhibit of a selection of the Postsecret postcards. The exhibit will run until October 8 and he will be back at the museum in the fall for a book signing.
I was fascinated by seeing the actual postcards. The real life sizes and the handmade nature. Being able to see both sides of some. The creativity in deciding how to express each secret. A few of the secrets made me shudder.
The exhibit was mentioned briefly on the Postsecret website. I don't know why it isn't mentioned there now but it is mentioned on the Reading Public Museum site. So if you're in Pennsylvania in the vicinity of Reading, you might want to visit. The other exhibits where the postcards have been shown were in the Alexandria, Virginia area.
From American Heritage.com: The Madness of Mary Lincoln by Jason Emerson. (Letters by Mary Lincoln are found in an old trunk. The letters reveal details about her confinement in an asylum and the estrangement from her son, Robert.)
From Worcester, Mass. telegram.com: Drunk driving report, arrest divides family. (Woman's call to police about drunk driving ends up with driver arrested and estrangement from her daughter and grandson.)
"One of the things we've always tried to do is give
families back a body," Harvey said, adding that some bodies have been
at the morgue for nine months. "But when we're looking for families, we
find that today we're not always dealing with the Ozzie-and-Harriet
close-knit families. Families are often estranged."
After a few years of hard work with Yardeni, Barr became kind of …
decent. "All my relationships and everything were pretty well damaged
by my bad behavior," says Barr. "I was able to turn around and heal
because of the fact that I could find a quiet space inside my mind and
get rid of my fear and feel love… . I had an estranged family—we didn't
speak for 15 years. Now I have a wonderful relationship with my mother
and my siblings and with my children and with everyone that I have
relationships with. I don't get high off getting angry anymore."
USA TODAY, April 23: Deep Inside Deep Throat By Bob Minzesheimer. Review of "A G-Man's Life" by Mark Felt and John O'Connor, the Felt family lawyer. Mark Felt was revealed in an article last year in Vanity Fair to be the "Deep Throat" of Watergate fame. One of the personal stories told in the book is about his estrangement and reconcilation with his daughter.
Months ago I read about this young guy in England who decided to earn tuition money by selling pixels on his home page. It's just a wonderful story of marketing and technology and money and ... It's just amazing. If you've never heard of it, it is such a neat story. So here is the link for his home page: Million Dollar Home Page
The page will take a while to load in unless you have a fast connection. But be sure to visit his blog that is linked at the top of the page. It will tell the whole story.
Yes. I know. This has nothing to do with estrangement.
But on a different note, a happy story that isn't brand new but is new to me as a dear online friend shared it with me today. This story had its beginnings around Christmastime in 2004: A Hippo and Tortoise Tale by Jennifer Ludden
One more of those stories that fascinate me. The kind where the downright upright solid citizen has a secret side that almost no one knows about and one day his sons wake up and discover that their father is a philandering crack smoking bank robber! At least two of them stop talking to him ... after they turn him in.