Open letter to some unknown person out there on the internet

What I like about being estranged:

Art, Websites, Criticism, Unsolicited Advice, Decisions

I am an artist. In real life I am an artist. I create stuff that people look at. I usually work in a medium that is other than what you are looking at right now. But I have created a few websites. This is one of them. The others are commercial or for a nonprofit or for fun.

If you visit Estrangements.com, you are visiting something that is created for you, the visitor, to look at, read, gather information, interpret, compare with your own experience, and do whatever you personally need to do with it. You came here for a reason. When you leave, you remember your experience and it registers with you in your own unique way.

When you come here, you bring to the table your own background, history, experience, stage in life, pain, opinions, education, memories. You see these pages filtered through all of that. How you feel will be unique to you. What judgments you form will not be in agreement with everyone who visits. It is as if you are looking at a painting. You may like it, dislike it, be apathetic, be furious, be sympathetic. Everyone's reaction is their own. Chances are that you will feel something.

When you come to Estrangements.com, you do not have full information. For all you know, the entire story told here could be a fiction. You have an incomplete picture. You come here and your mind fills in the blanks. You form judgments. You make conclusions. When you have a question, you sometimes provide answers by yourself.

Whomever you are, your reaction is affected by whomever you are. You fill in the blanks in your own way. You become an interpreter.

When you look at art, your reaction is influenced by whether you understand certain things or not. One year you might see a work of art one way. Another year you might see it a different way. This is one of the interesting things about art. You look at it and then you try to understand it and your understanding is affected by what is inside yourself.

As an artist, when I create a work of art, I want to have an impact on the viewer, This is the same whether I am using words or pictures or another medium. I want you to leave with something. I can't control what it is that you leave with. Everyone will leave with what is uniquely their own reaction.

There are those who think that if I take estrangements.com down, that I would have a chance of reconciliation with my daughter. They came here and that is the thought that they left with as well as judgments of this website. That is okay. That is their opinion. I am glad that they visited. They may remember this website in years to come. Their opinion may remain the same. It may change. They took something with them. I am happy that they did, no matter what it is.

I would not take this website down on the chance that my daughter would reconcile with me if I did. I can think of a number of reasons why that would not work for me. It isn't important to me to list them or to argue with anyone who thinks I should take it down or to worry about their opinion of me.

This is my artistic expression. It is important to me. I know that a lot of people have visited this website over four years. I am sure each had their own reaction to it. This is my online creation. Negative reactions are as good as positive ones for an artist.

One thing I have never liked is unsolicited advice whether it came from relatives, friends or strangers. I don't know about you but unsolicited advice is irritating to me. So many people feel free to give it. They don't see it as a boundary violation. They think that they are being wise and probably thoughtful. I think that they can mind their own business.

On the other hand I understand the temptation to give unsolicited advice as there have been times that I thought that I was wiser than someone else and I have made judgments and given advice which was not welcome. Restraining myself got easier as I got older.

This website will continue.

Snicks

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