In recent months several friends and acquaintances have been reporting either reconciliations or communications from relatives that may lead to a full reconciliation. I have been delighted for them. Some have reconciled even though they had been assaulted physically by the relative who estranged them. Some had experienced verbal abuse. In each case they were delighted to hear from their returning relatives.
Posts from November 2007
And a special Happy Thanksgiving to my most frequent visitor!
Wishing you a great day!
I know an eighty-something woman who is one of the most delightful people I have ever met. She is funny, witty, smart, well traveled, generous, hardworking, and charming. I want to be her when I grow up! I love this woman.
A private invitation only support group has been set up and invitations sent to those who inquired. Please check your email for the notice that your invitation will be arriving and for the invitation itself. Just in case you have a zealous spam filter.
Being someone who suffers from clinical depression on occasion, I find that dwelling on sad subjects triggers my depression. Thus spending a lot of time writing about and talking about sad memories is a dangerously self indulgent exercise for me to do.
Here come the holidays, heading straight for us as sure as sure can be. This time of year is a hard one for many, especially those of us who know that our holidays are far from the ideal of the delightful sleigh ride in the snow, jingle bells jingling as we travel to grandmother's house bearing brightly wrapped gifts with love, laughter and warmth like a wool blanket protecting us from the frigid breath of winter. So here we are, holidays approaching like a train with us on the train tracks once again, hoping for the best.
I wrote this piece to offer on another site which was soliciting writing on the topic of mothers and how they shaped our lives. How do we celebrate our mothers? I wrote this piece I offer below and then realized that it wasn't the right kind of response to that solicitation as well as being too long. I can't call it a celebration. I wrote some more and decided to include it here. Here is my story of my mother and what I remember that was positive and some that is negative about her being my mother:
"For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: "It might have been!"
from the poem "Maud Miller" by John Greenleaf Whittier (1807-1892)
My father died in October of 1988. He died the day before my mother's birthday. They had been divorced for twenty years. They had been married for twenty-five years prior to the divorce.
If you visit here much, you've noticed that there are few comments. I've noticed that too and have given it some thought. While comments are few and far between, I do receive the occasional email. This dearth of comments is something I could get defensive about. Why so few comments? Is it a good blog if there are almost no comments? Is it a bad blog? Must I come up with a reason for the lack of comments?
My mother had estranged herself from me from 1978 to 1981. My estrangement from my daughter began in 1995. The current estrangement from my mother began in 2002 at my initiative. I created the website, Estrangements.com, in 2001. I've been reading, writing, thinking, researching, and talking about family estrangement since 1995.