Australian blogger on family estrangement: E-stranged
Being estranged and letting petty stuff get to us.

How dumb & crazy would I have to be to do that?

Or maybe the title of this post could be "People who are never ever wrong".

I used to have a rather close relationship with someone who could never be wrong. It was crazymaking. In the middle of an argument, he'd change his position to mine as though it was his own all along rather than admit that his original position was not correct. He'd do this when his own position became difficult to defend. Do you know someone like this? It is crazymaking. Not everyone is like this.

What brings me here today to talk about the need to be right? What brings me here is a link that I saw today when I updated my own personal blog that I have under my own name. My personal blog is not linked to this site and not connected to the subject of this site. But it is linked to another site by someone who does not like me.

What comes up in my posting window when I am writing an update on my personal blog is a link to my personal blog from outside of my blog. The link is to a post about me and it links my personal blog to their blog. I don't know if this link showing up in my own blog update window is a glitch in Blogger or if it is how things are supposed to work? The title of the link and its short Google synopsis of its content indicated that the linker thinks that I have visited their own site and that the proof is that the linker saw visits to their own site that are coming directly from typed urls rather than links. This is not the first time I've seen that link on my own blog. I've been trying to ignore it. I do not click on it.

Apparently the blogger/linker thought that I am the only person who would type an url in to visit their site? That typed urls by visitors to their blog must be typed by me? But I am so "dumb", according to them, that I would do that anyway as I must visit their blog and I must try to disguise my visits. That is what the person apparently tells themself. Apparently the blogger/linker thought that there is no possibility that I am able to restrain myself from visiting their blog despite the reports given to me by others of what I would find there. Apparently the linker thought that I would willingly subject myself to reading things that would be upsetting to me and that the fact that I have blocked them from commenting on my own blog and on this blog and on Twitter after their harrassing me doesn't mean to them what it would mean to most people. It means I do not want to read what they write and do not want to have that kind of stress in my life. Just the fact of the word "dumb" being in the title of the linked post to my blog is enough for me. Just the fact that I have seen words describing me as crazy in other links in the list of links of visitors to my own blog is enough for me to keep me from visiting and reading a blog written by that person.

I have said in the past that I do not go and read what is written on that blog. But the person who does not like me is always right and therefore, in their mind, I have visited. It is not possible that I do not visit. They don't know me very well or they'd realize that I would not do that to myself. Plus they think that if I did visit that I would disguise the fact that I visited. But I am so dumb that I would reveal my identity by typing in the url. Dumb, dumb, dumb. So dumb! I am dumb! Not possible that it is someone else who types in an url. Just not possible. Not possible that I don't visit. Just not possible. It is probably also impossible to imagine that I could glean this much from a post title and a Google synopsis. The very fact that I am writing this post must mean that I have visited the blog. I am that dumb that I'd do that! How do I manage to walk and chew gum at the same time? Well, I don't chew gum. So that is how I manage. I have bad dreams about chewing gum but I digress . . .

In my own real life I know how often I am wrong and I've made my share of mistakes. I think that it's important to be able to admit when we are wrong about something. I do it pretty regularly.

The linker can go ahead and believe that they are right and that a typed url means that I am the one who has visited their blog. It is their belief and they are entitled to it. Despite the fact that I have enough self control and enough self esteem that I would not go and look for things to read where I have been told that I was the subject of insults and attacks.

If I could remove that link from showing up when I do the updates to my personal blog, I would. But I have no clue how to do it or if it can be done. Today the fact that I saw it yet again is what brought me here to say something about it. I have ignored it for quite some time but today I decided to say something.

I can say that I have had the unpleasant experience of being estranged from more than one family member and of being called dumb and crazy by them. Hey, cool! Well, no, not cool but I can live with that fact. However I don't go looking for more. I am not quite as dumb and crazy as that!

I guess that the blogger/linker must think I go around sticking forks into my forehead too? Why not? If their blog was so irresistable to me that I absolutely couldn't stay away from it, why wouldn't I stick a fork into my forehead? It would be quicker and less painful to do that than to spend time reading what they have to say about me on that blog. (The last time I looked in the mirror I had no marks in my forehead!)

I am classifying this post in two of my categories: Weblogs and Therapeutic as it is therapeutic of me to write this post!

Link this!

Ginny

Postscript: Happy discovery! I learned that if I turn off the Backlinks setting in Blogger, any links to my Blogger blog no longer show up in the Blogger Preview Window. Cool!

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