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13 Things No Estranged Child Needs To Hear On Father’s Day – Mommyish

On Mommyish.com (click the link below the quote to bring up the page and read the rest):
Even though I really love my father, I’m beginning to hate Father’s Day. The only silver lining is that I now I have a husband and kids, and I see the potential for Father’s Day to be a loving family celebration.

via www.mommyish.com


Christopher Hitchens Article on Estrangement, Vanity Fair, 2005

The writer Christopher Hitchens has died. I've spent much of my day so far reading obituaries about him and watching videos of him on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Among the many words written by and about him, I found an article by Hitchens on the estrangements that occur between siblings. It is titled: "Oh Brother, Why Art Thou" and was written in 2005. He had been estranged from his brother, Peter Hitchens. They eventually reconciled.

Here is the link to the article:

"Oh Brother, Why Art Thou?" by Christopher Hitchens in Vanity Fair, May 16, 2005

and here is a link to today's post by Peter Hitchens on the death of his brother:

By Peter Hitchens, December 16, 2011: In Memoriam: Christopher Hitchens, 1949-2011

and a link to an earlier post by Peter Hitchens on the relationship with his brother and their eventual reconciliation:

"How I found God and peace with my atheist brother" by Peter Hitchens, March 11, 2010


For Mother's Day: Mother's Day & Estrangement Links

Happy Mother's Day from Your Estranged Daughter, May 7, 2011

Estranged from my mother no more: A Mother's Day Remembrance, May 8, 2011

Not So Happy Mother's Day, May 8, 2009

Mother's Day is over, May 8, 2011

Mother's Day Special: PTSD and estrangement of family 'cause I gotta pay the money back, May 10, 2009

Mother's Day Without a Mother, May 7, 2011


Personal stories of loss through estrangement and death

The link below goes to a story by a son on the death of his father from whom he was estranged. They were estranged because of the father's deterioration due to Alzheimer's. It is a poignant story that is accompanied below on that page by links to the stories of others who were estranged from their fathers.

Dealing with the death of an estranged father by S. C. Kleinhans

 


Gifts of kindness: Softening the blow of family estrangement

Kindness has been on my mind in recent days. How kindness is a beautiful quality in people. How it softens the blows of life. What a difference a kindness can make. How it can cost so very little. What a wonderful present it is to give the gift of kindness.

Today's post is a list of articles that relate to Christmas, relationships, and the benefits of kindness. These all relate to family estrangements or conflicts in some way. Some more directly than others.

 


More from Dr. Cara Barker on being estranged from family

After Dr. Barker's article last week that touched on estrangement, she received so many responses that she continued on that topic today:

December 20, 2010: Learning to Love from Afar by Dr. Cara Barker

(I particularly liked what one of her readers said: "Don't trip on what's behind you.")


Dec. 20: Articles on coping with being estranged during Christmas

Thanksgiving is in the subject title but Gould writes about the entire holiday season, not only Thanksgiving, in this article that touches on the more difficult situations that we deal with at this time of year. Including estrangement:

November 23, 2010: Thanksgiving - - Sink or Swim by Roger Gould, author of Shrink Yourself: End Emotional Eating

Put away the feelings of victimization. Read what Fiona has to say about feeling like a victim:

December 20, 2010 Have Yourself a Very Merry, Victim Free, Christmas by Fiona McColl


On Huffington Post: Dr. Cara Barker on Family Estrangement

Are you looking for advice on how to cope through the holidays despite being estranged? I found an excellent article today on that topic on the Huffington Post. The title is misleading. It is more about how to heal and cope despite being estranged rather than how to mend bridges. Be sure not to miss the Comments section which you find by scrolling way down below the article. The link is as follows:

How to Mend Bridges with Estranged Family Members During the Holidays by Dr. Cara Barker

Dr. Barker makes a reference to a poem by Howard Thurman. The link to the poem online is as follows:

I will light candles this Christmas, a poem by Howard Thurman

I didn't know who Howard Thurman was. So I looked him up. Links are as follows:

Howard Thurman

Howard Thurman on Wikipedia

Wishing you Peace in the holiday season,

Ginny


Father's Day and Estrangement: a keyword search on June 1 '08

  1. Monday, June 18, 2007: She She on Father's Day Quote from She She: "There are no black hats. There are no white hats. There is only gray, and it’s the most beautiful of colors."
  2. Tuesday, May 6, 2008: Word Count II: Dear Monty Quote: "At this time, I am thinking of just sending a Father's Day card with my name on it. That is all I can bear right now."
  3. Tuesday, May 20, 2008: Passiam's Lodge: Control is an Illlusion. Quote: " If you read my Tweet, it talks about my mother wanting to bring my estranged and financially-challenged biological father . . . "
  4. Wednesday, May 14, 2008 McCall's Manic Merry-Go-Round: Mother's Day Schmothers Day Quote: "Next celebration to consider -- well other than some conspicuous birthdays -- is Father's Day, which is when I give John his props for dealing with all, and resolving most, of the "Daddy Issues" I carry around."
  5. Monday, May 12, 2008 Crossing Channels: The Commodification of Feelings. Quote: "This epidemic has been caused by a consumer culture that preys on the minds of gullible individuals and turns them into consumers hungry for love."
  6. Wednesday, May 7, 2008: Dating Trials and Tribulations: Un-official dating holiday. Quote: "Why is it that the week before Mother's Day or Father's Day considered to be a dating "National Holiday", comparable to the Fourth of July, Thanksgiving or Christmas???"